"i feel like a toasted sandwich"
Tanya, while sitting next to a heater
"Are you going to shave your legs for the formal?"
"Baby don't leave me this way!"
Mr Reis, to Melinda when she was showing how to use his mobile
"You need to think more about sex, girls."
Ms Gazis in respose to our reluctance to point out the sexual connotations in Kubla Khan
"Mixing opium and alcohol in the eighteenth century is just like taking Panadol you know"
Ms Greenaway, when talking about Coleridge's opium addiction
"I don't need clothes to show what sort of a man I am"
Mr Howden. He meant to say clothes don't make the man, apparently.
"...not near as sorry as you will be when i've finished with you"
Mr Marussich, after someone threw a candle at the wall, it bounced off and hit him (that is after taking a bite out of the candle).
"Y'know girls, divers and snorklers make great kissers because they've got strong mouth muscles. Oh by the way, I dive"
Mr. Marussich. Chucky takes upon himself to put an entire year 8 science class into therapy.
"Now girls don't tell your english/ geography/ history/ physics teachers/ mrs murray I said this..."
Mr Rozga, every time he was about to say something he shouldn't.
"For those of you who don't know me, my name is Spanky
'HI SPANKY'.. ad nausem"
Spanky, at Year 9 Camp
"Don't be a salmon: Do the mongo!!"
Gloria. This is what happens when you encourage people to come out of their shell!! Be warned.
"Numbers are adjectives and don't exist, therefore the whole of maths is non-existant"
Bethie trying to work out why we were listening to Mr Howden.
"Girls you haven't driven yet... legally"
Mrs St John in early year 10
Mrs Goodall: "I'm trying to give you lots of exposure"
Elspeth: "People die of exposure"
Fun and games in year 11 maths
"Now girls, we like atomic bombs because we can use them to blow up asteroids if they become a threat"
Mr Rozga. General goings-on of 4Ch1
"Girls do you know what inconsiderate means?, it means not considerate"
Cummins in year 12 English.
"not of this makes sense"
by schofield. written on part of Lauren's science exam paper in year 10
"Kogorah High? Is that the one we pass everyday on the way to school?"
Susan Yeung at Uni Info Day 1999
"Never drink vodka straight out of the freezer"
Mr Wright with some advice to remember
"By now you should have enough to be able to bullshit quite well.... but with some substance"
Ms Voss after crapping on about Othello for a double period
Chantelle: "Has the cardboard for the frame come in yet?"
Ms Polglase: "I don't know, have you asked?"
"I don't usually go to the toilet!"
"...at the end of the novel, they have SEX!!!"
Ms Cummins, then giggled for 10 minutes. (It wasn't even true).
"Girls, underline this as you write it.
Oh sorry, I thought you were a typewriter"
"If I was a dog, I'd bite you Natasha"
Dr Powell speaking during class to Natasha Nielson
"Kinaesthetic is how a skilled performer feels themselves"
"That's great Natasha!!"
Mrs Nelson's comment after Natasha Grey finished reading a passage on domestic violence
"Oh who am I to stop you, but if your marks go down, I'll kill you"
Mr Murray in response to Danielson wanting to do 15 units
"My demand is insatiable"
"Why don't you wear a stanley?"
Mr Allum. (He meant a spencer)
"I'm firing today. You either have verbal constipation or verbal diahroea"
"Wan Bing stop assaulting that volleyball net"
"If I was a woman, I'd be a lesbian"
"Do not take advantage of my good nature!"
Ms Voss. (she was very angry!)
"Just can't get enough"
Mr Malyon, He was dancing around the room with condoms on each of his fingers singing this. (The condoms are part of Jade's artwork)
"I know a lady who goes naked skinny-dipping"
"I'm a man goddamnit!"
Mr Malyon talking about essentialist feminist imagery
"Isn't asbestos when the food is overdue?"
"Of course I believe in God, I see him every morning in the bathroom mirror!"
If you can't recognise divinity when it's staring you in the face...well, I'll just have to write my name on the board again"
Mr Baker... again
Class: "You're not God"
Baker: "Yeah, but I'm as close as you'll ever get"
Mr Baker... this time during Maths class
"Just think of me as the Maths 'High Priestess'"
Mr Malyon, when he was a substitute Maths teacher
"You're not here"
Amy and Callina, as they convinced a Year 11 maths class that there was a room change, only to find they were completely wrong, and had to go to the room the Year 11 class now occupied.
"Everyone's tipping tax reform, even the Catholics and they've got connections when predicting what would be in the Economics HSC"
"Stocks you are a language teacher"
Lisa, when Kristyn had sworn in Indo and Ms Stocker repremanded her